The draft came and went, as did the summer league(s) and it doesn’t look like the Thunder’s going to do anything in free agency. And there’s over three months until the season starts. So what am I supposed to do with myself? Watch the WNBA? Yeah and after that I’ll stare at the sun for two hours. Don’t fret, I’ve got ideas to get you through the actual offseason.
Watch baseball. It’s not everybody’s thing, but I dig it. It’s more than enough to keep me occupied for now, especially because there’s a game every day and I have a favorite team. And if you hate baseball, I guess watch soccer or something. Or go live in Europe because obviously you hate America. Why don’t you kick a baby and curse the name of Stephen Colbert on your way out too.
Read every college football preview on the planet. As much as we all love the Thunder, this is still a college football state. And it probably will always be unless John Blake comes back for Round 2. There’s something like 2 billion college football preview magazines and they’re all saying basically the exact same thing. So do yourself a favor and read every single one of them. I know you’re dying to know what Phil Steele has to say about the TCU secondary. Don’t pretend like you’re not.
Likewise, complain about the BCS. I actually am a fan of it, but evidently to hold your college football fan card, you must spend at least 15 minutes of your day whining about it and talking about how perfect and wonderful a playoff would be. The more you gripe to your roommate about it, the faster it will get fixed. I think we’re using the same approach for the economy.
Try out for the Thunder girls. What’s that? Only girls are allowed to try out? Sexist pigs. Oh well, their loss. I have some awesome moves and look excellent in a cutoff jean shorts and an open plaid blouse. The finals are tonight at Toby Keith’s so if you’re weird and creepy, be sure to go there and “watch.”
Work on your post game. With OKC’s best option on the block being either Nick Collison or Shaun Livingston (yes, seriously, Shaun Livingston), you never know. Especially if you’re freakishly tall. You could wind up with a roster spot. Hey, it worked for Robert Swift. Keep Reading…