The Side Part: Week 5 – Thanks
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Thanksgiving is upon us and as the basketball season gets its legs underneath it, Thunder fans are learning more and more about this team. Hell’s getting cold as apparently Derek Fisher has decided to be a lockdown defender this season. Scott Brooks is still refusing to wear his glasses during the game. Kevin Durant’s got a new restaurant and the whole team really enjoyed themselves at its opening. So on.
And now, alliteration: Thunder things to be thankful for.
– The continual development of Reggie Jackson.
– That the bathroom pic never fails.
– The fact that Steven Adams would be appear to be made of whatever they use to make Carhart jackets.
– Kendrick Perkins taking pictures of himself.
– Hasheem Thabeet getting someone to take pictures of him in, just, the largest scarf imaginable.
– Scott Brooks’ ethereal voice-of-God prayer-like campfire under the stars while we talk about our feelings and how Jars of Clay just gets it like Audio Adrenaline never could Wired Up segments.
– Kevin Durant pulling up on the break.
– Russell Westbrook’s joyful celebrations.
– That the bathroom pic never fails.
– Jeremy Lamb being able to shoot some so I can tell him and Thabo apart on tiny televisions in restaurants.
– Nick Collison having never done anything wrong.
– The fact that I’m surprised when Serge misses an 18 footer.
– That now, in his fifth year, we’ve finally, for the most part, been able to put to bed the Serge isn’t as good as Surge jokes.
– That because the word “Ibaka” sounds a little like the end of Chewbacca, whenever Serge does anything good my friend Cal does a Chewbacca yell.
– That the bathroom pic never fails.
– That one day we’ll have a supercut of Russell Westbrook singing along to whatever banger the OKC game ops crew is playing.
– That Thunder fans are in range as soon as they enter the building.
– Perkins commitment to resurrecting the Pharaoh beard at least a couple times a year.
– Durant’s shoulder shimmy at the free throw line.
– That nobody on the Thunder wears true no-show ankle socks.
– Jeremy Lamb’s floater that drips out of the sky like dew from Heaven on the wings of golden doves, cawing and hooting like an autotuned Brian Davis out of a timeout.
– THAT THE BATHROOM PIC NEVER FAILS.
– That Perry Jones considers underage kids grownups if they’re talking bad about him. No mercy.
– That you can’t get no more free Randy.
– That dressing strangely doesn’t just begin when the post-season starts.
– That this made Serge lol so much he had to include five exclamation points.
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Also, wanted to say thanks to you for reading this nonsense. The general silliness of this column is not lost on me and I’m aware that it’s much different from the analysis Royce brings. As most of you have, I’ve read this site since its inception way back when and I’m still floored that I get to write for it even a little bit. I appreciate you reading. Awful kind of you. This column got moved up a couple days this week because, really, who wants to read anything other than scores on Thanksgiving? Enjoy your families and your friends and the turkey and the football and the food comas. And as Thanksgiving comes and goes and the lights of Christmas start twinkling bright and fuzzy in the dead trees off in the smoky, soon-to-be-December distance — shadows being flung down onto the red clay looking like hands stretching out across the prairie night — let’s all agree to put some Kings and Jaxs on our wish lists for Santa this year.
